And Then Along Comes Raymond...
When it all goes crazy and the thrill is gone
When the days get rainy and the nights get long
When you get that feelin you were born to lose
Starin' at your ceiling feelin' the blues
Life has taken a number of purely Crap turns in the last 3 or so months. Enough turns that per my excellent Raymond training, I denned up. Denning up is a two edge sword, plenty of victims - sometimes a survivor. One never knows how it's going to play out.
When I went to the hole, I chose to go by myself so I cut off the steady Raymond stream of support and new found communication between us. I'm not sure how he got through to me a couple of days ago but he always had a knack about finding me...no matter what... Just Remember I love You and it'll be all right. There is still a lot going on with no resolution and quite frankly I'm dog ass tired... hence the hole.
My job was yanked out from under me in May after assurances that the Contract Bridge was being prepared for the express purpose of keeping me. Even the Division Director told me and my go to Lead personally that they did not want to "Lose Me", however it turns out that unbeknownst to her, to my go to Lead, to my Company or to myself the Contract was prepared by the Department Lead for someone else using my documentation on the Process utilized to do the job to prepare the Contract. I'm literally too old to be able to pick up a new job johnny on the spot. It has been 6 weeks, 4 failed interviews and one in the pipe. I keep asking how does it get any better than this and what else is possible? Surely there is a forever home for me somewhere. State Unemployment mandated me to come in for a "Retraining and Assessment" appointment. Retraining for what I don't know, I'm in the "can't teach an old dog new tricks" category. I was mad as Hell for having to go in to have someone talk down to me after 46 years in basically the same type of Administrative jobs in a variety of specialized fields due to the moving around that I had to do. I was pretty amused when the Assessor told me that I should be teaching the Resume Classes... she had never seen a Client resume done so well.... Other than that, the whole thing was a waste of her time and mine. Just remember I Love you and it will be all right
Next in line is the Dentist, you know ... the one with the Crown. Three months after a cleaning, 4 cavities and a crown I went back for the last exam and cleaning that would be covered by the insurance because I have no idea how long before I have insurance again. Three more cavities, one of which is not covered because it was filled within the last 24 months. How does that happen in 3 months when the only thing that has changed is your employment status? and then... the cleaning and the exam turns out not to be covered... even though the Dentist office told me my insurance covered 2 cleanings a calendar year. I asked them to make sure there was not an every 6 months limitation and they assured me in 3 phone calls that was not the case. No job, unemployment issues and a $300 dentist bill.
Next, God help you when you turn 65 and you get to experience the joys of signing up for Medicare... which comes in parts and turns out is NOT Free, just another racket. So I had to fork over $536 for part B of that lovely plan... with no job and unemployment issues.
Like I said, quite frankly I'm dog ass tired.. hence the hole.
The only saving grace is the reminder from Raymond to reach out.
JUST REMEMBER I LOVE YOU
Firefall
When it all goes crazy and the thrill is gone
When the days get rainy and the nights get long
When you get that feelin you were born to lose
Starin' at your ceiling feelin' the blues
When there's so much trouble that you want to cry
When your love has crumbled and you don't know why
When your hopes are fading and they can't be found
Dreams have left you waiting friends let you down
Well just remember I love you
And it'll be all right
Just remember I love you
More than I can say just remember I love you
Maybe all your blues will fade away
When you need a lover and you're down so low
And you start to wonder but you never know
When it seems like sorrow is your only friend
Knowing that tomorrow you'll feel this way again
When the blues come callin' at the break of dawn
When the rain keeps fallin' but the rainbow's gone
When you feel like cryin' but the tears won't come
Then your dreams are dyin' when you're on the run
Just remember I love you
And it'll be all right
Just remember I love you
More than I can say just remember I love you
Maybe all your blues will wash away
Songwriters: ROBERTS
Just Remember I Love You lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC